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Great Recession Won't Leave, Sleeps On Couch

The U.S. Department of Labor reports this morning that the U.S. unemployment rate has edged up to 9.8%.

Hey, let's just round it up to 10% already since economists say the unemployment report will reach the double digits very soon. We've hit a record for the longest period of high unemployment since the early 1980s. Forget the Pat Benatar and "Morning In America" days though, because the times we're living in are more like "Morning In Las Vegas" after a night of binge drinking with William Hung singing continuously in the background.

Here's the official BLS report on the employment situation for your reading pleasure. Maybe you should wait for Friday happy hour before reading it, though, since these reports tend to go down better with a glass of Two Buck Chuck or cheap, store-bought beer, the designated go-to drinks in this never-ending recession. If you're one of the long-term unemployed, happy hour starts at 2 in the afternoon.

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